Saturday, November 26, 2005

To my bloggers & blogettes, hope your having a great & happy Thanksgiving weekend. I found this & got quite a giggle out of it . I thought I would share it with the rest of you. Hope it warms the cockles of your heart during our end of November cold.
Peter
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ELEMENTARY BIBLE SCHOOL TEST

PAY SPECIAL ATTENTION TO THE WORDING AND SPELLING. IF YOU KNOW THE
BIBLE EVEN A LITTLE, YOU'LL FIND THIS HILARIOUS!

IT COMES FROM A CATHOLIC ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEST. KIDS WERE ASKED
QUESTIONS ABOUT THE OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS. THE FOLLOWING STATEMENTS
ABOUT THE BIBLE WERE WRITTEN BY CHILDREN. THEY HAVE NOT BEEN RETOUCHED NOR
CORRECTED.

INCORRECT SPELLING HAS BEEN LEFT IN.

1.IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OFCREATING THE
WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF.

2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH'S WIFE WAS JOAN
OF ARK. NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.

3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE
DURING THE NIGHT.

4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND UNSYMPATHETIC TO GENITALS.

5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL
LIKE DELILAH.

6. SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.

7.MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD
WHICH IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS.

8, THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. AFTERWARDS, MOSES
WENT UP TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.

9. THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.

10. THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.

11. MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA . THEN JOSHUA LED THE
HEBREWS IN THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.

12. THE GREATEST MIRACLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO
STAND STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.

13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE
FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.

14.SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVID'S SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.

15.WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA.

16.WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND JESUE IN THE MANAGER.

17.JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION.

18.ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.

19. JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE
THEY DO ONE TO YOU. HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEATALONE.

20.IT WAS A MIRACLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET THE
TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE.

21.THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.

22. THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.

23.ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN..

24.ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY WHICH IS
ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRIAGE.

25.CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY.>

Friday, November 18, 2005

Well its been a week since we have been home, but it seems like 5 since I was in Texas! For 40 days & 40 nights, we sought out areas of the ocean to drop in our mullet(not the haircut, but the minnow) baited hooks searching for the best the coastal bend has to offer in the way of edible fish. We caught flounder, spanish mackeral,mangrove snapper, croaker, pigfish, reddrum, stingrays, a shark, a baby king baracuda, gaff catfish, dogfish(which is really ugly),an eel of some kind, spotted trout, sand trout(which are fun to feed to the pelicans) and lots of little perch, which you can use for bait.

As we were leaving Port Aransas it was about 82 and 3 days later when we left San Antonio on our way home it was 94 most of the way through north Texas!! It wasn't till night time in Okla. that it got down in the low 40's. It's nice being home were everything is familiar, but we do enjoy the town of Port A and the weather!!

We posted a few more pictures. The best one being Nancy with her 39in Red Drum she caught on the bay boat. She also won the biggest fish contest that day and twice more during our trip. The prize is always 2 passes for the boat and a share of the pot.


We have one of our flounder in case not everyone knows what they look like. Notice the teeth. Everything in the ocean big or small, has teeth.


Here is one of the stingrays we caught. The poisonous barb is on its tail.


Last but not least of our pictures is one of our new pet poodle. His name is blackjack just like our cat....wait he is our cat. Someones Mother had an idea to have him groomed beyond belief. Yikes! Actually we do like it and are going to keep him that way. BTW He still has his halloween eyes in if you were wondering.


The one thing that I am still getting used to is going from the mid 80's to the mid 30's and snow in just over a week. The cake with no frosting is there is another 5 months of this cold!!Dratssssss GRRRRRRR
Love you all my snowy little monkies.
Brother/Uncle/Son/Lover/Peter

Thursday, November 03, 2005

As our time on the coastal bend shortens too quickly by the day, at least we'll get to have another fresh fish dinner tonight. Tonight it'll be some yummy gaff catfish caught by Nancy the hook! Fish fear her! And some kick ass jumbo shrimp just caught this morning by our favorite shrimpin' boat, the Polly-Anna. She lives just a few hundred yards from our temporary TX home when not shrimping. If you're around the channel, you can see her head out to sea in the early evening. well it's getting to be that time, so take care my slippery little monkeys. love ya'll, and see you soon.

I generally haven’t posted religious posts but there’s been soon scuttlebutt as to religion being injected into our current way of life by those in power. Mainly from, in my humble guesstamation, the current resident of the white house, congress, and a huge majority of the populous wanting it, or thinking they do. Some say it’s about time to ‘get our nation back on track.’
And others judge you or me saying it’s the wrong sort of christian influence because it’s not their personal flavor. Yet still others say there shouldn’t be any God influence in our government because our founding fathers placed strict limitations into several of the most important documents to found and run this great nation we call America.
The one law or rule that has been beaten up and down over and over by many groups and political parties for their benefit is the the ‘Separation of church and state’. Which as I’m recalling it as, ‘the government shall make or impose no religion upon the people but shall support all legal and recognized religions’. Now many have said that the founding fathers were God fearing men... I would agree, but as the below quotes from some of the founding fathers might suggest they or many of them may have been deists not theists! I just found it interesting. ----------
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The Faith of our Founding Fathers, by Dean Worbois

No one disputes the faith of our Founding Fathers. To speak of unalienable Rights being endowed by a Creator certainly shows a sensitivity to our spiritual selves. What is surprising is when fundamentalist Christians think the Founding Fathers' faith had anything to do with the Bible. Without exception, the faith of our Founding Fathers was deist, not theist. It was best expressed earlier in the Declaration of Independence, when they spoke of "the Laws of Nature" and of "Nature's God."
In a sermon of October 1831, Episcopalian minister Bird Wilson said,
Among all of our Presidents, from Washington downward, not one was a professor of religion, at least not of more than Unitarianism.

The Bible? Here is what our Founding Fathers wrote about Bible-based Christianity:
Thomas Jefferson:
I have examined all the known superstitions of the world, and I do not find in our particular superstition of Christianity one redeeming feature. They are all alike founded on fables and mythology. Millions of innocent men, women and children, since the introduction of Christianity, have been burnt, tortured, fined and imprisoned. What has been the effect of this coercion? To make one half the world fools and the other half hypocrites; to support roguery and error all over the earth.

SIX HISTORIC AMERICANS,
by John E. Remsburg, letter to William Short
Jefferson again:
Christianity...(has become) the most perverted system that ever shone on man. ...Rogueries, absurdities and untruths were perpetrated upon the teachings of Jesus by a large band of dupes and importers led by Paul, the first great corrupter of the teaching of Jesus.
More Jefferson:
The clergy converted the simple teachings of Jesus into an engine for enslaving mankind and adulterated by artificial constructions into a contrivance to filch wealth and power to themselves...these clergy, in fact, constitute the real Anti-Christ.
Jefferson's word for the Bible?
Dunghill.
John Adams:
Where do we find a precept in the Bible for Creeds, Confessions, Doctrines and Oaths, and whole carloads of other trumpery that we find religion encumbered with in these days?
Also Adams:
The doctrine of the divinity of Jesus is made a convenient cover for absurdity.
Adams signed the Treaty of Tripoli. Article 11 states:
The Government of the United States is not in any sense founded on the Christian religion.
Here's Thomas Paine:
I would not dare to so dishonor my Creator God by attaching His name to that book (the Bible).

Among the most detestable villains in history, you could not find one worse than Moses. Here is an order, attributed to 'God' to butcher the boys, to massacre the mothers and to debauch and rape the daughters. I would not dare so dishonor my Creator's name by (attaching) it to this filthy book (the Bible).

It is the duty of every true Deist to vindicate the moral justice of God against the evils of the Bible.

Accustom a people to believe that priests and clergy can forgive sins...and you will have sins in abundance.

The Christian church has set up a religion of pomp and revenue in pretended imitation of a person (Jesus) who lived a life of poverty.

Finally let's hear from James Madison:
What influence in fact have Christian ecclesiastical establishments had on civil society? In many instances they have been upholding the thrones of political tyranny. In no instance have they been seen as the guardians of the liberties of the people. Rulers who wished to subvert the public liberty have found in the clergy convenient auxiliaries. A just government, instituted to secure and perpetuate liberty, does not need the clergy.

Madison objected to state-supported chaplains in Congress and to the exemption of churches from taxation. He wrote:
Religion and government will both exist in greater purity, the less they are mixed together.

These founding fathers were a reflection of the American population. Having escaped from the state-established religions of Europe, only 7% of the people in the 13 colonies belonged to a church when the Declaration of Independence was signed.
Among those who confuse Christianity with the founding of America, the rise of conservative Baptists is one of the more interesting developments. The Baptists believed God's authority came from the people, not the priesthood, and they had been persecuted for this belief. It was they—the Baptists—who were instrumental in securing the separation of church and state. They knew you can not have a "one-way wall" that lets religion into government but that does not let it out. They knew no religion is capable of handling political power without becoming corrupted by it. And, perhaps, they knew it was Christ himself who first proposed the separation of church and state: Give unto Caesar that which is Caesar's and unto the Lord that which is the Lord's.
In the last five years the Baptists have been taken over by a fundamentalist faction that insists authority comes from the Bible and that the individual must accept the interpretation of the Bible from a higher authority. These usurpers of the Baptist faith are those who insist they should meddle in the affairs of the government and it is they who insist the government should meddle in the beliefs of individuals.
The price of Liberty is constant vigilance. Religious fundamentalism and zealous patriotism have always been the forces which require the greatest attention.
And a final thought from me is remembering that I was raised baptist, but I think I have become more 'en-lighted' from my childhood.